Wednesday, August 10, 2005

mother!!!

well,
here i am discussing about my mama....its been 6months,i havn't seen my mother....all thnx to my studies
Today,when i got my result,i was damn upset,cos it didn't turn out to be the way i had expected.....even if i had worked my ass off,and when my mom called me up,i told her about the percent...she wasn't very hpy,but i blew it on her on the phone....i was so rude that i even had those shitty guts to even hang up on her....later on i called my frnd,and told her what happened...so while i was tellin her bout it,my mom called her not knowin i was talkin to her..so my frnd told me to hang up...
so after few mins,my mom called me up again,after all the clarifications made by my frnd....i was so lost and so confused that i went speechless and cudn't say anything gr8 to my mother....i was feelin guilty and angry,both at the same time...and was findin it all the more difficult to sort it out....but then,my mom helped me with my problem....i felt so nice about it,but then,now i didn't have the guts to even apologise now,cos i had said so much shit to her in the previous call....but i did....i was actaully upset cos i was gettin more and more clueless regarding the way my paper was gettin checked....plethora of questions were runnin in my head....so many doubts...and with all of it goin haywire,i wanted to get angry,but on whom...on the checkers...hahaha,they wud reduce my marks further ....and so,i got it all out on my mama,i felt so bad,but my mom didn't feel the way i was feelin for her...she was like,"good...atleast,u got ur anger out on someone....y were u holdin it up,inside u"....but she was equally upset,cos i began to cry,all thnx to my marks..i was feelin really bad....and i had no one to turn to...how cud i...
my dad is in america,my bro in bombay and my mom in jammu...and here i am...in delhi...all by myself...my mom was like,"its not ur fault....ur still struggling,while the rest of us have,almost, passed through that phase...it'll take time,and u'll have to bear more pain to get to where u have to....so dn't give up now...work harder for the next sem...."
what an advice...i felt relieved,however i'm still upset about my result...but this time i'll slog my ass again,right frm the scratch...hopefully, this time,i dn't get betrayed by my luck again...looks like my luck is out for vaccation...lol

but one thing is for sure,someone said it right," god cannot be everywhere,so he made mother."
i miss u a lot mama...and i love u so much,but stupid as i am.....(dn't know what to say),u know it more than me
god,thnk u...wish i cud be home at this very moment
i love u,mama

11 Comments:

Blogger Naresh said...

I miss my mom 2!!! I luv u, mama!

11:25 AM  
Blogger Sujith said...

hmmm... parents are always a bliss. its okey since u told sorry to her.. mother's can always understand it. but next time onwards... :-)

5:29 PM  
Blogger Anjalika said...

to naresh
wat 2do....their absence blackmail us,and thus we miss them...
to jithu
i'll make sure that i dn't commit that same mistake again..

7:18 AM  
Blogger Prasoon said...

Just one word on what u felt the first time ur mom called - that one word would be - $#it Happens - n now what u did later, well thats natural. so never mind n keep going..
All the best.

2:10 PM  
Blogger Anjalika said...

to prasoon
well,what can i say...gr8 mind think alike

11:19 PM  
Blogger Anjalika said...

to prasson...
did u check my new blog?wat bout readin the others....

12:14 AM  
Blogger Anjalika said...

sry prasoon,got ur name wrong

12:14 AM  
Blogger Mirage said...

Hey nikku!! Sorry yaar didnt get a chance to go thru ur blog for sometime... n dumbass i told u na not to weep over those stupid marks! n theyre not as bad as u think!! May be ur mom jes expected you to do slighlty better! N ur right...Moms always always understand exactly what ur goin thru! Even if u lashed out at her she knws wht goes inside that little brain of urs! a similar thing happened wid me n my mom, bt on some other issue. i was rude as hell, but later i went and hugged her and we wept together a bit! she told me tht the imp thing is to realise ur wrong and own upto ur mistakes! which u did! so just chill! moms cant hold grudges against their own kids! :)

6:41 AM  
Blogger Anjalika said...

mirage,
u know the most funny part,infact its paradoxically funny,when i'm at home,my mom is there,and when i'm here,my frnds turn out to be my mothers...i'm so lucky...thnk u so much for being there for me...guess,i'll not only have to celebrate frndship day with u all,but mother's day too...lol

3:46 AM  
Blogger Richa said...

hey...its true-even if u're holding up your emotions strongly-as soon as u hear your mom's voice u just tend to break down.at least thats what happens with me-its an overwhelming feeling.

7:26 AM  
Blogger Anjalika said...

becomin a stranger to myself....
that was wat i wanted to hear...u r right bout it..."maaa,hoti aise...sabko rulaa deti hai.."

7:55 AM  

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